AMYAMYAMYAMYAMYYYYY!!!!

Jan 25, 2012 12:27pm

College Kid President

suburbantragic:

  • College Kid President pulls an all-nighter because he forgot to write the State of The Union
  • College Kid President took too much adderall and now we’re at war with Norway
  • College Kid President disbands Secret Service, forms “Secret Brosephs.”
  • College Kid President makes “Infinity Guitars” the national anthem
  • College Kid President turns Air Force One into a longboard
  • College Kid President ran out of meal plan
  • College Kid President gives the best high fives

(via synecdoche)

Jan 19, 2012 12:30pm

http://drunkronswanson.com/

Jan 17, 2012 7:26pm
oldsamcole: Amy! Also, fidelity! (and friendship? maybe I’m making that part up because I LOVE THEM.)

oldsamcole:

Amy!

Also, fidelity! (and friendship? maybe I’m making that part up because I LOVE THEM.)

(Source: threewordphrase)
Jan 12, 2012 7:39pm
DOGS!!!!

DOGS!!!!

(Source: youngmanandoldsoul, via menandtheirdogs)
Dec 30, 2011 4:05pm

thedailywhat:

Afternoon Snack: Happy Nom Year! From Teddy Bear the Talking Porcupine.

[thanks allison!]

He’s drunk already.
Dec 28, 2011 9:19pm
animalstalkinginallcaps: AH, MR. AND MRS. DEVONSHIRE! WELCOME! LUCIUS WILL TAKE YOUR COATS. PLEASE, FOLLOW HIM TO THE MAIN BALLROOM. I SHALL JOIN YOU PRESENTLY. I’M SIMPLY TAKING THE AIR FOR A MOMENT. LOVELY DAY, ISN’T IT? SIMPLY LOVELY.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

AH, MR. AND MRS. DEVONSHIRE! WELCOME!

LUCIUS WILL TAKE YOUR COATS. PLEASE, FOLLOW HIM TO THE MAIN BALLROOM. I SHALL JOIN YOU PRESENTLY. I’M SIMPLY TAKING THE AIR FOR A MOMENT.

LOVELY DAY, ISN’T IT?

SIMPLY LOVELY.
Dec 16, 2011 10:44pm

SAM MAYBE YOU CAN CATCH ME SOME OF THESE WHEN YOU PLAY YOUR VIDEO GAMES

(Source: pusheen, via happyhibisci)
Nov 21, 2011 9:58pm
SAM. SOMETIMES THE INTERNET IS ABOUT YOU.

SAM. SOMETIMES THE INTERNET IS ABOUT YOU.

(Source: sheisdancingawayfromyounow, via monkeysinthemarginalia)
Nov 12, 2011 9:31pm
animalstalkinginallcaps: GOOD AFTERNOON, MR. PEMBROOK. I HAVE THE INFORMATION YOU REQUESTED. I FEARED FOR A MOMENT THAT I WOULD BE DISCOVERED WHEN MS. HOUGHTON COULDN’T FIND HER POST-IT NOTES, BUT WILLIAM TANNER FROM ACCOUNTS RECEIVABLE HAS A KEY TO THE SUPPLY CLOSET, WHICH IS ONLY THE BEGINNING OF YOUR WORRIES. THIS OFFICE IS CORRUPT, MR. PEMBROOK. I FEAR NO ONE IS INNOCENT.  PETTY THEFT, PERSONAL PHONE CALLS, INTERDEPARTMENTAL AFFAIRS (OF THE SEXUAL VARIETY) … THE LIST IS ENDLESS. AND THE I.T. DEPARTMENT, MY GOD. THAT WHOLE FLOOR OF THE BUILDING SHOULD BE SEALED OFF AND BURNED WITH ALL EMPLOYEES INSIDE. TAKE A SEAT, MR. PEMBROOK, WHILE I ORGANIZE MY NOTES. POUR YOURSELF A DRINK IF YOU WISH. WE ARE GOING TO BE HERE FOR QUITE SOME TIME.

animalstalkinginallcaps:

GOOD AFTERNOON, MR. PEMBROOK. I HAVE THE INFORMATION YOU REQUESTED.

I FEARED FOR A MOMENT THAT I WOULD BE DISCOVERED WHEN MS. HOUGHTON COULDN’T FIND HER POST-IT NOTES, BUT WILLIAM TANNER FROM ACCOUNTS RECEIVABLE HAS A KEY TO THE SUPPLY CLOSET, WHICH IS ONLY THE BEGINNING OF YOUR WORRIES. THIS OFFICE IS CORRUPT, MR. PEMBROOK. I FEAR NO ONE IS INNOCENT. 

PETTY THEFT, PERSONAL PHONE CALLS, INTERDEPARTMENTAL AFFAIRS (OF THE SEXUAL VARIETY) … THE LIST IS ENDLESS.

AND THE I.T. DEPARTMENT, MY GOD. THAT WHOLE FLOOR OF THE BUILDING SHOULD BE SEALED OFF AND BURNED WITH ALL EMPLOYEES INSIDE.

TAKE A SEAT, MR. PEMBROOK, WHILE I ORGANIZE MY NOTES. POUR YOURSELF A DRINK IF YOU WISH. WE ARE GOING TO BE HERE FOR QUITE SOME TIME.
Nov 10, 2011 11:21pm
animalstalkinginallcaps: Walter, have you been mechanized? BOOYAH! IT’S CALLED A DEFENSE BUDGET, MY FRIEND! “INSURGENTS” IN IRAQ AND AFGHANISTAN ARE FIGHTING US WITH ANTIQUE AK-47S? LET’S SEE THEM TRY TO USE THOSE ON A GODDAMNED DOLPHIN WITH LASERS. I’M NOT EVEN A PERSON! AND I HAVE LASERS, MOTHERFUCKER! You don’t think that’s a bit excessive? WE BOMB LIBYA FOR FUN! WE INVENTED GUNS THAT SHOOT AROUND CORNERS! WE SPEND TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS EVERY YEAR ON “DEFENSE” FOR A COUNTRY THAT IS ESSENTIALLY ISOLATED FROM EVERYTHING EXCEPT CANADA AND MEXICO SO THAT PEOPLE WITH SLINGSHOTS AND REVOLVERS DON’T “TERRORIZE” US! NOTHING EXCESSIVE ABOUT THAT. THAT’S OUR TAX DOLLARS IN ACTION! ALL THAT MONEY HAS TO GO SOMEWHERE. WHY NOT MY FINS? But this is an illegal war started under false pretenses. Shouldn’t the government be trying to end it, not wasting the money of citizens who want their troops brought home? Shouldn’t we be letting these ‘insurgents’ get back to their lives? YOU THINK MAYBE OUR RESOURCES WOULD BE BETTER SPENT ON INFRASTRUCTURE AND HEALTHCARE AT HOME? YOU THINK THESE BROWN STRANGERS WHO NEVER ACTUALLY ATTACKED AMERICA JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE TO REBUILD THE CITIES WE ILLEGALLY INVADED AND DESTROYED? WELL, TOO BAD! GOING I’M GOING TO RISE UP FROM THE WAVES AND SAW THEM IN HALF WITH INTENSELY FOCUSED LIGHT! I GOT THAT BOOM BADOOM BOOM BOOM BADOOM BOOM BASS! I GOT THAT SUPERBASS! AND LASERS!

animalstalkinginallcaps:

Walter, have you been mechanized?

BOOYAH! IT’S CALLED A DEFENSE BUDGET, MY FRIEND!

“INSURGENTS” IN IRAQ AND AFGHANISTAN ARE FIGHTING US WITH ANTIQUE AK-47S? LET’S SEE THEM TRY TO USE THOSE ON A GODDAMNED DOLPHIN WITH LASERS. I’M NOT EVEN A PERSON! AND I HAVE LASERS, MOTHERFUCKER!

You don’t think that’s a bit excessive?

WE BOMB LIBYA FOR FUN! WE INVENTED GUNS THAT SHOOT AROUND CORNERS! WE SPEND TRILLIONS OF DOLLARS EVERY YEAR ON “DEFENSE” FOR A COUNTRY THAT IS ESSENTIALLY ISOLATED FROM EVERYTHING EXCEPT CANADA AND MEXICO SO THAT PEOPLE WITH SLINGSHOTS AND REVOLVERS DON’T “TERRORIZE” US! NOTHING EXCESSIVE ABOUT THAT. THAT’S OUR TAX DOLLARS IN ACTION! ALL THAT MONEY HAS TO GO SOMEWHERE. WHY NOT MY FINS?

But this is an illegal war started under false pretenses. Shouldn’t the government be trying to end it, not wasting the money of citizens who want their troops brought home? Shouldn’t we be letting these ‘insurgents’ get back to their lives?

YOU THINK MAYBE OUR RESOURCES WOULD BE BETTER SPENT ON INFRASTRUCTURE AND HEALTHCARE AT HOME? YOU THINK THESE BROWN STRANGERS WHO NEVER ACTUALLY ATTACKED AMERICA JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE TO REBUILD THE CITIES WE ILLEGALLY INVADED AND DESTROYED? WELL, TOO BAD! GOING I’M GOING TO RISE UP FROM THE WAVES AND SAW THEM IN HALF WITH INTENSELY FOCUSED LIGHT! I GOT THAT BOOM BADOOM BOOM BOOM BADOOM BOOM BASS! I GOT THAT SUPERBASS! AND LASERS!
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